BOTW #...oh wait, nevermind

Yeah, as you may have noticed there was not a new BOTW blog yesterday. In fact, there will not be one this week. I'm uber-busy and stressed and, also, I haven't been to the grocery store in a while. So yeah. I'll try and get back on track next week, but no promises!

Happy early Thanksgiving though!

BOTW #10: Jaffa Cakes

Name: Jaffa Cakes
Producer: McVitie’s

Oh my gosh. I’ve been waiting ages for this one. Jaffa Cakes. Yes. Jaffa Cakes are, to be concise, the best. I love Jaffa Cakes and I’ve loved them since my first trip to Ireland four years ago. I still remember the day that I found out that World Market in Tempe sold Jaffa Cakes. *sigh* Good times.

This week’s review is thanks to a wonderful amazing incredible deal at SuperValu during which I purchased:


See that? 100% EXTRA FREE!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!


Jaffa Cakes are composed of a soft cakey biscuit base topped with tangy marmalade-y orange jelly/gelatin stuff and covered in dark chocolate. Oh man. Here you can see and maybe get a better idea of the texture of the orange filling.


Actually, Jaffa Cakes are a popular remake on the fabulous Pimp My Snack website, which exists as a forum for people who want to take their favorite snacks and make them ridiculously large. Most Jaffa-makers agree that the best way to replicate the orange filling is to make orange gelatin but using only half the suggested amount of water. Imagine Jello made with half the water. That’s the texture we’re talking about.


Jaffa Cakes are delicious and McVitie’s knows it…check out the way the package presents the consumer hotline (you can click on the image to see it larger in a new window). They’re so delicious that they’ve become hardwired into British culture and you’ll hear references to them all the time. Here’s one of my favorite references to Jaffas (it doesn’t hurt that it’s from Spaced, the fantastic British sitcom from the holy trinity of Simon Pegg, Nick Frost, and Edgar Wright). Sorry that I cannot embed the video, but you really should click on that link and watch how an innocent discussion about Star Wars ends with one of my favorite snack foods.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EZnsOZsA7_4

BOTW #9: Jammie Dodgers

Name: Jammie Dodgers
Producer: Burton’s Foods

If last week’s “Cow Biscuits” were any indication that I’ll buy food based solely on cuteness, this week’s biscuit shows the power of a funny name. May I introduce you to BOTW #9: the Jammie Dodgers.


Described worryingly as “Delicious stretchy jam splodged at the heart of 2 yummy shortcake biscuits,” the red and yellow package of Jammie Dodgers was tossed into my basket this week.

At first glance, the Jammie Dodgers seem a pretty solid contender for decent biscuit status. They are a manageable size, they have the light golden dry and crumbly shortbread biscuit I’ve come to expect, and in the little heart-shaped cutout in the center of the biscuits you can see the raspberry jam glistening. So far, so good.


With the first bite, however, you realize what it was about the package’s description that worried you so. “Stretchy jam” indeed. Rather than the expected delicious silky jam, you’re confronted with something a bit more along the lines of gummy candy. The stretchy jam and crumbling cookie are really a messy and inconvenient combination of textures.


Being a good biscuit reviewer though, you decide you have to follow through and finish the darn thing. Then you realize, about three bites in, that you are…enjoying it. What? How did this happen? By what right has this biscuit gotten better?

You scramble madly looking for the ingredient list on the back of the package. Surely some hallucinogenic agent must be added to the cookies for this result. Then you see it. Damn you, Burton’s. You know exactly what you’re doing, you cagey tricksters. There, on the back of the wrapper, in red italics you read:
“Shortcake biscuits sandwiched with raspberry flavoured jam. What makes ‘em so yummy?”

If only I knew. If only I knew.

And here, thanks to the glories of YouTube, is what I always think of whenever I eat a Jammie Dodger. From his "Glorious" show, Eddie Izzard (my favorite transvestite British stand-up comedian) talks about biscuits on a plane...the relevant bit starts at about the 4:30 mark (and runs to about 7:00, but I recommend the whole show).

Unintentional humor (humour?) of the day...

So this evening I received an e-mail. Nothing too out of the ordinary right? Well, the aforementioned e-mail happened to be from Michael, my supremely useless study abroad advisor in the states. The e-mail was a mass-mailing to all students abroad for the academic year reminding us to register for our special study abroad placeholder class for spring. The fairly unassuming, uninteresting, and uninspiring e-mail ended with this gem straight out of some essay about racism in the 19th century or "Gone with the Wind" or something:

"I hope you are all doing well in your place..."

Why he did not simply say "in your respective countries" or "on your programs" or even just "abroad" I will never know. And yet, I am grateful because I have not stopped giggling yet. Thanks a bundle, Mike. Keep up the good work!

Breaking news...

My friends, good news! John Hodgman* (self-described "minor television personality") apparently plays the ukulele! His final post on the meta-blog BoingBoing was a video in which he held up a beautiful little ukulele and strummed a C chord. *sigh* I think I'm in love...


*Most people will know John Hodgman from his Daily Show appearances and his run as the PC in the Apple commercials. He is also, however, a talented writer (his second book was just released a couple of weeks ago) of false almanacs and compendiums of the wild and weird, and one of my favorite bloggers. You too can read his blog at: http://www.areasofmyexpertise.com

Oh dears...

So, against my better judgement I have made a video. I made this last night, but it took all night to upload (darn sluggish internet connection!)...enjoy?


The Ukulectoral College from Anna Bierne on Vimeo.

BOTW #8: Cow Biscuits!

After last Monday being a Bank Holiday and all, BOTW is back. 

Name: Cow Biscuits
Producer: Elkes
Slogan: “Amoozing Malted Milk Biscuits”

As we’ve seen before, I’m not above purchasing biscuits simply because they are pretty or, as in this week’s case, cute. Behold! The COW BISCUIT!



Billing itself as having “a whole herd in every pack,” this modest little wrapped bundle o’ biscuits called to me from the shelves of SuperValu. Being plain malted milk biscuits, these cookies are your basic simple, dry, slightly sweetened, perfect for dunking biscuit. While they aren’t bad, they aren’t Club Milk either if you catch my drift. The main appeal here, though, is the appearance.



Each Cow Biscuit is stamped with an image. Here you can see four different examples (there were probably 6 or 7 different designs distributed throughout my pack). Not only does each biscuit have an image stamped into it, these images all revolve around cow puns also. Epic win! Here you can see (from left to right):
Moo-dy, Cow Hide, Moo-stache, and Heifer-vescent. And a close-up of Moo-stache. Because it’s the best.



Cow Biscuits were simple, tasty, and affordable. Their cute factor really pushed them over the brink though onto my list of favorite biscuits.

And, thankfully, as the package makes clear: “No cow suffered in the making of these biscuits.”

And introducing...

So last Wednesday, exhausted and ill, I somehow managed to drag myself out of my apartment and go to a concert. A concert for which the doors didn't even open until 10:30pm. I am so punk rock.

Anyways, the show was a band called "Tilly and The Wall" from Nebraska. I'd never heard of them but one of my friends here was a fan.

It was awesome.

The band comes onstage and they're a riot of neon spandex polka-dot striped 1980s fury. The percussion is provided by both an accomplished drummer and a tap dancer. On a box. Yes. With each song they walked a delicate line between pure 80s sugary pop hit and hard-hitting punk energy. Here are a couple of music videos (both from their new album) to demonstrate the difference:

Sugary poppy dancey (and yes, the girl wore that pieced together yellow and pink dress at the concert)


Brasher energetic enthusiasm


If you're interested in Tilly and the Wall (and you really should be), check out their MySpace for more music and concert dates at Tilly and the Wall's Official MySpace